#Weeknotes 96 (18 Oct) — Book clubs, the cost of freemium, and redirecting attention
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Work wise:
My highlight this week at work was joining a remote book club meeting set up by our organisation’s Women’s Inclusive Network. I love the idea of book clubs as they are great motivators for me to commit to a book and finish it in a sensible time frame. I only just managed to finish reading the book around lunchtime, just hours before the meeting. It really works! Without a deadline, I don’t know when I would get through the book.
While 38 people accepted the book club invite, only four of us, myself included were present! It worked out in my favour as I prefer small group discussions. There’s more space for each person to voice thoughts and opinions without feeling overwhelmed.
The book we discussed was Celeste Ng’s Little Fires Everywhere. It was a slow start for me to get into the book, but once I reached nearly halfway, I was hooked. The book had many themes that resonated with me:
- Motherhood: What made someone a mother? Is it by blood, or by love? Who determines one’s ‘qualifications’ to be a mom?
- Identity: What happens when we’re faced with identities opposite our own? A tendency to reject and fear them rather than embrace them?
- Art: What is art? Just because some don’t understand it, it isn’t less of an Art. Who can judge what is, isn’t, and the quality?
- Social inequality: People suffer in different ways, the difference is those who are more privileged, can often circumvent it.
- Morality: What is fairness? What’s fair to one person may not be to the other. Our obsession with fairness forces a more clear-cut distinction between right and wrong. The human experience, however, exists in the in-between.
My favourite quotes in the book:
“Fair doesn’t always mean right.”
“The problem with rules was that they implied a right way and a wrong way to do things. When, in fact, most of the time there were simply ways, none of them quite wrong or quite right, and nothing to tell you for sure which side of the line you stood on.”
Despite being someone who often reads non-fiction, I highly recommend this book!
Life wise:
My mom flew from Vancouver Island to stay with us for two weeks. It’s the first time she journeyed alone since she married her late husband a few decades ago. It’s also our first time to have her stay with us. I wasn’t sure what to expect and was worried that she’d be bored while I had to work or that her presence would add to the already chaotic routines at home.
Thankfully, her first few days went by pleasantly. It was nice to have another adult around to care for the toddler, someone who can also help around the house and is a good cook! Having another adult to rely on does make an otherwise manic day a lot more manageable. I can see why families live close so that they can better support each other. It’s funny how as a young adult, I just wanted to get away and have my independence, and now that I have a dependent, I yearn for that proximity again.
A friend asked me if I pay to use Duolingo because the ads were driving her nuts. I do. And I would recommend others too if affordability isn’t an issue. It wasn’t until I got the subscription, thanks to my partner as part of a gift, that I truly started appreciating the time I got back no longer bombarded by ads. Born into a humble Chinese household, I grew up obsessing with bargains, hoarding, and anything free. Only when I grew older and further from my family’s influence that I started questioning the idea of ‘free’ and the hidden costs of ‘free’. There’s a reason that the adage “You get what you pay for” has stood its time and exists across so many cultures. For freemium apps like Duolingo, the cost of free is the cost of your time and sanity. Those who are more privileged can afford to get that time and sanity back. Yay for equality right?
Things I came across:
I enjoyed reading Tim Urban’s article on why he took his toddler to watch a rocket launch. Like most parents, we want to shield our children from the bad and the ugly of the world. It’s an impossible task. But what’s within our control, is being intentional about what and where to direct our children’s attention to. Tim did this by engaging his daughter in things that are inspiring and incredible like the rocket launch, showing the incredible feats humanity has to offer. I may just take a page from his article and try to be more intentional about the things my child gets exposed to. Such hard work being a parent.
Quote of the week:
“Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.” —Via DD
Photo of the week:
